Parents of teens....advice please!!! :-(?

I have a 13 yr. old daughter. She is driving me nuts!! She attends a private school, %26amp; got suspended. She got caught in the basement of the school kissing a boy. She almost got expelled because of the act (strict school) but they cut her a break since she had never been in trouble before. We put her on punishment (no cell phone, computer, etc.) Actually we took her cell indefinitely because she has been caught by us texting very inappropriate things to random boys, giving her # out on myspace %26amp; tons more. She went back to school and got caught sending the boy a text via one of her friends telling him she loves him, blah, blah. The principle intercepted the text because she happened to see the boy with a phone and they are prohibited (again strict school) so we got called to the school. Again almost expelled, %26amp; her punishment extended %26amp; the 2 of them are not allowed to even look in each others direction. Now I find out that someone told her the boy got her Valentines stuff %26amp; she is so excited %26amp; thinks she is in love. The big problem is we've applied to a private high school (she got accepted). We have to pay registration fees, uniforms, %26amp; our first installment toward tuition. All of which are non refundable should she mess up any more. We've told her this and tried everything...it's all going in one ear %26amp; out of the other. Any advice would be great!Parents of teens....advice please!!! :-(?
OMG I was doing so much worse at her age LOL! You're doing a great job though, really. Just stand your ground %26amp; be firm. My husband has a 16 yr old daughter with his ex %26amp; the girl is always half dressed on her myspace page. I think her mom is too much of a friend %26amp; not enough of a parent. That would never happen on my watch. I commend you for being concerned %26amp; being a good example for her.





Maybe you should come up with a spreadsheet detailing all of the costs involved for the school %26amp; let her know that if something goes bad, she'll be the one paying it off. She could put $10 towards the balance SHE owes for cleaning the house top to bottom every Sunday. Sounds mean but maybe she needs a lesson in money %26amp; to understand that what you're giving her is a gift, not a rite of passage. Too many teenagers these days have the Paris Hilton syndrome %26amp; the bratty attitude like they're owed something.Parents of teens....advice please!!! :-(?
your first problem was givng a 13 year old a cell phone and letting her have a myspace (or if you didn't know about the myspace, you weren't monitoring her internet use).








Most 13 year olds are boy crazy...let it pass and let her get her heart broken. I can't see yanking her out of her school just because she gets in trouble a few times. This happens in public school all the time.
You're child is obviously rebelling and if she thinks she's ';in love'; she's probably going to do whatever is necessary to see the guy. So maybe you should get her into another school NOW to avoid problems later. If the boy is attending the same private high school, I'd prob do some reconsidering. best of luck
Although I am not an adult, i am a teenager. We will always get crushes and want to talk to the boy. It's something ALL Teen girls do, it's just a phase, but don't be too hard on her. Show how much you care for her, maybe she doesn't like the private school and needs to be around more friends who are girls.





But, if she's putting her number everywhere, watch her. You don't want her to meet a random boy and then have her change.
spank her! noo just kidding, just try to be friends' with her then ask her why she's doing this, try to tell her that she should act the way she used to act before she did all these things,





or give her a real horrible punishment :/ thats all i got.


because once i skipped school and whooa i got a horrible horrible punishment and i never did it or even thought of it again
Obviously that school is insanely strict and is not a good place for your daughter anyways. Kissing at 13 is NOT a big deal. it sucks that all of that is non-refundable I guess this is why you shouldn't send your kids to schools like this. She probably hates the school anyways. You trying to control her this much will just lead to her being more of a little ****. Trust me I know. (are they on 'bans'?)
It's good that you're not just allowing her to do whatever she wants with boys. Ground her for a long time. Don't let her use the computer or phone.





Yeah, it is just part of being a teen but parents need to be more strict about things like this.
This article helped me get through to mine (linked below)... just explain to her that it will be a big waste of money, and make the consequences worse since she is obviously not afriad of getting in trouble right now.
Let the freaking girl be! Teens will be teens. That school is crap. Move to another city. Homeschool her. Do SOMETHING. I agree with Bri Bri, quit sheltering the freaking child. Let her have a life and be a friend, and maybe she won't end up pregnant.
Welcome to the world of teenagers! Try talking to her and reasoning which you probably won't get any response, but maybe it will sink in later. You got to be strict, otherwise things will only get worse. Hold your ground!
honestly i think the problem is the strict school she's going to.


she probably can't handle all the rules and feels the need to break them.


i think you should consider sending her to a public school.
tell her what happens to teens like her. they give out their number and they talk ';fall in love'; and then she gets raped..


and who know what else.


she has to know the consequences before she becomes a statistic
I know someone like that. Military school. Whip her as.s into shape.
well dont send her to a private school and then she will see that what she did really messed her up hope this helps
My suggestion is, let her see the boy (visits at either your home or his home, supervised by a parent - i.e. in the living room where you can keep and eye on him). She is most likely rebelling as a ';I will see him, text him, etc. because you can't tell me what to do'; sort of thing. If you allow her to see this boy, she may stop acting up because she will not be breaking rules by seeing him.
okay i know it said it was for parents and i am a teen(16) but let me tell u a little bit...


first of all ya she is just a kid if she was just kissing the boy there is nothing wrong with that but if it was something more then its bad.


second private schools are worse then public school take it from me. my best friend used to go to a private school and u might think u know everything that goes on there but in truth u do not. at privates there is way more drugs alcohol and sex. and the only reason private schools are ';better'; is because they teach religion, which i don't have a problem with but their academics are just the same with public.


okay sorry for going off but back to your daughter just sit down with her and talk--no screaming--just talking and ask her whats with all the rebelling and come to a compromise--she behaves she can one date a week or something.





sorry for the book lol good luck though=)
Shes just acting like a normal teen. Just because shes in a private school, shouldnt mean she cant love a guy. If i were u, i would take my kid out of that school for stopping those kids from being just normal teens. ALL TEENS ACT LIKE THAT. we get crushes. dont be hard on her.








She needs to see the out side world. i hate when parents put kids in private school. They need to see what really happens when **** like that happens.
ok im just like that but i go to a public school and if we kissed in front of teachers or even hugged or held hands we would get P.D.A. (public display of affection) which is bad but you need to know when we are teens we are unstopable and we always find ways, i've already got my cell phone taken away and grounded but i still find ways so i would just let her kiss but not on school grounds or infront of you cuz shes going to do it anyway the only way she wont is if you home school her.
Uhm, you're going to get over the whole ';sneaking up to the basement'; thing. She's a horny teenager now and things like this are bound to happen. As for the txting and what not, I've gotten caught doing that stuff too, but wouldn't you rather us be talking about it then doing it?? Most of the teenagers talk like that because it helps them get out the sexualness that they are afraid to show in public or watever. Thats just how teenagers are. So yeah, don't be too hard on her, because like, there is nothing you can really do about it, it's just a phase in her life.
Block Myspace on your computer and take her texting plan off her phone until she shapes up. You can't stop her from texting on her friends phones, but she's gotta learn some things on her own, you know?





I'd ask her how she feels about going to a private high school. She'll probably care a lot about not having to change schools where she has no friends there, blah, blah, blah.





Tell her, ';You know what, sweetie, we've been really concerned about putting you in that school. Recently you've been getting in trouble (Insert protest that they're all picking on her/it's not her fault) and we don't want to put forth such a big commitment financially to your high school if we know that this is going to continue. What do you suggest we do?';





Ask her her opinion on the subject and include her in the descisions.





Good luck!!!
I have a 13 yr. old daughter. I found out that she had a boyfriend for a week. I was so angry. I don't allow her to have a boyfriend only because i don't see her do her best in school. So i made her break up with him. I also don't let her have B/F because i see all of her friends cry, act soooo stupid over there boyfriends when they break up.I want my daughter to be a teenager. Not act like she is married..lol.


Well I got very angry with her sneaking a b/f, So i spanked her.I do believe in spanking Not child abuse. But i also let my anger get the best of me. I regret spanking her. So i started to talk to her about it,she said she wanted to tell me, but she knew i would get mad.


So we talked and we came to a decision that would help both of us so we don't start fighting, and she dont start to rebel on me.


I told her to wait until she is 14, so it gives me time to let it soak in. But i will have to meet him. They will not be alone. I know how u feel somewhat but u have to stop being so damn strict. U can still be a friend..just know ur limits. Make sure she knows ur still her mom. I love my daughters. Which i know u want the best for yours.. That's what teenagers don't understand. So try and talk to her about how she feels. But let her talk and don't say anything. Let her vent and cry etc..


It might make yall alil closer. I hope i helped a little bit.
put her upfor adoption.