Friday, April 30, 2010

Great site for advice, random stuff, stories, talking and moree! ESPECIALLY FOR TEENS AND TWEENS. =]?

http://spazztastic.boardzero.com/forum.h鈥?/a>





you can only see the forums after you sign up and sigh in. =]Great site for advice, random stuff, stories, talking and moree! ESPECIALLY FOR TEENS AND TWEENS. =]?
Good. Will it lure them away from Y!A?

Need some advice on teen dieting and workout plan?

I need some help losing weight. I'm an 18 y/o male, 6'2, and embarrassed to admit that i weigh 195 lbs. I would like to lose 25-30 lbs. I don't need to lose it in a month, but would like to be down to that in about 3-4 months. I want to lose weight, but I honestly don't know where to begin! I have cut down majorly on the junk food, and nearly cut out red meat. It is kinda working, but not nearly enough. I want to work out, but I really don't know how to begin.


I have heard SO many diet tips, but a lot of it is nearly impossible to do without having a health food store nearby or starving myself. I want to eat healthy and exercise, but I need some advice as to how to start it. ANY help would be greatly appreciated.


B.T.W.: I have been down to 179 lbs. and felt great. I worked on the treadmill and tried my own diet, and it was working, then I lost my motivation. How can I stay motivated to keep at it when results seem so far away?Need some advice on teen dieting and workout plan?
Do Crunches. Lie on the floor (with or without a mat). Cross your arms in front of your chest. (Donot place both hands behind your head. Placing both hands behind your head can cause lower back problems in the long run as it places unnecessary stress on that part of your body from pulling on your head and neck.) Another alternative to crossing your arms in front of your chest is to lightly place your finger tips behind your ears, without pulling on your neck or ears to help raise you off the floor. Draw in your abdomen towards your spine while inhaling through your nose. Now raise your shoulders (upper torso) towards your knees, using strictly your abdominal muscles. It is very important not to lift your entire back off the floor, as this can cause back strain, and the extended movement does not help you develop six pack abs any faster. The most important part of the crunch is the initial flexing of your abs as you lift your shoulders off of the floor. As soon as you begin lifting off the floor exhale through your mouth, ending with a gasp once your shoulders are off the floor. Then pause for a second once you are at the top of the crunch and exhale the last bit of air from your diaphragm while flexing your abs. The proper breathing and flexing make all the difference. Now lower back down slowly and controlled while inhaling through your nose, just until your shoulder blades touch the ground. Do not let your head touch the ground and repeat.





Do Sit Ups. Lie on the floor, feet on the floor, knees up and hands behind your head or crossed on your chest. Sit all the way up, lifting your lower back off the floor along with your shoulder blades. Lower yourself down. Repeat. Once this becomes relatively easy for you (i.e. you can do a quite a bit with ease) start adding more challenges. Find an incline bench or do these on an exercise ball. Once you ';graduate'; from that, do weighted sit ups. Hold a weight on your chest while you do these. As these become easier, hold heavier and heavier weights. You might also try lifting your feet off the ground while doing the sit ups or alternating the leg in the air, like pretending to pedal while sitting up. If your hands are behind your head, bring your left knee up to touch your right elbow and then your right knee to the left elbow.


Do Leg Lifts. Lie on the floor, legs straight out, hands at your sides. Lift your legs straight up (not bending your knees at all) until they're at a ninety degree angle (or close). Lower your legs and repeat without letting your legs touch the floor. For more challenge there is equipment at most gyms that will allow you to raise yourself up using your arms as support and dangle your legs. You can perform leg lifts there too. If you're using this piece of equipment, you can make it easier by just raising your knees to your chest. It's more difficult to raise your legs to a horizontal position with your legs straight. This helps firm up the lower abdomen. If you're truly a monster, try doing leg lifts with a medicine ball hanging from your feet. Or hang from a pull up bar and raise your legs in front of you all the way up to the bar. Still too easy?...


Do Jackknife Sit Ups. Lie down flat on the floor. Place your hands on the ground to your sides for balance; you can pick them up as you get used to the movement. Simultaneously raise your knees and torso so that your knees and face meet on an imaginary line extending from your pelvis to the ceiling. You should be able to kiss your knees at the top of the motion. Your legs will naturally fold bringing your feet towards your hips, much like a jackknife. Lie back down (i.e. ';spread out';) and repeat. Place a weight between your feet when you think you can handle it. What's that? More?


Do V-ups. Lie on the floor, legs straight out, hands on the floor but this time extended out over your head. Simultaneously raise legs and torso. Don't bend your knees! What kind of V would it be if you bend your knees? Reach with your hands toward the raised feet. Touch your feet if possible (might require some flexibility). Relax, return to starting position and repeat. Add weight between feet to match your taste.


Static Hold and Side Statics. Put your body into the push-up position but with your elbows on the floor, and you whole body flat. This position is known as the static hold position and it trains your core (including your abs) to hold the body in place which is the real purpose of your abs. Hold this position for as long as possible, but you should be aiming to start off with at least 45 seconds, while seasoned ab workers known to achieve over 20 minute static holds. To perform the side static hold roll onto one side of your body and lift into the same position as before, but this time only one arm will be on the ground with the other arm pointed straight up the air and your non-weight bearing leg resting on your bottom leg. Once again, hold this for as long as possible


Train Your Oblique Muscles. It's not as important to work on your oblique muscles at first, but eventually you'll want to start working these too. These are the muscles to either side of your stomach. There are multiple ways to do this and anything that includes twisting your torso against a resistance counts. There are twisting machines at gyms, you can twist while you do sit-ups, you can do side bends, you can twist side to side with a medicine ball in hand, etc. Be aware though, that many beginners tend to have weak obliques compared to their abs (it simply isn't used as much in daily life) so go easy on the sides at first.


Other stuff Since it is, literally, the center of your body there are many other tricks you can use to train your abs, and some of the other movements will more or less involve your abs. Including every abdominal exercise in existence would make this article painfully long and new methods are being developed constantly. Now that you've made up your mind about a washboard mid-section, get creative! Find new ways to crunch, bend and twist in your daily life. Some possibilities include:


Use a stability ball. Do your crunches on the ball to introduce instability to your workout, which will improve your balance too. There are also lots of core exercises that can be done with a stability ball.You can also use a small bubble use for physical therapy.


Duck and twist during your daily routine. Reach with your left hand to things on your right and vice versa. If you feel like turning around to face something, see if you can do it with keeping your hips in place and twisting at the waist (warning: awkward when talking to other people, use only against inanimate objects). While walking or standing, pretend that something is coming toward you and you have to duck to get out of the way. Do this as often as you are comfortable or at times when it won't look weird. You can bend forward from the hips or, if you're really into it, bend at the knees too and really ';sink'; out of the way.











Lose Fat


Lift Weights. The more muscle your body has, the more calories your body burns, even at rest. Many people are afraid of getting huge due to weight lifting. This is meaningless. You will NOT gain a lot of mass if you're not taking in a lot of calories as well. Also keep in mind that most of the huge people you see on TV or in print achieve that state by going on high protein and high carb diets. They increase their calorie intake specifically to bulk up. So the fear of bulking up should NOT be a reason to not lift weights. As a rule of thumb, the larger the muscle the more energy it will burn to sustain itself. Therefore the most effective muscle groups to work for fat loss are large muscle groups: thighs and hamstrings, the back, and the chest. You can also lift your body weight without going to a gym, through push ups, sit ups, chin ups, etc.





Do Cardio. No matter how muscular your abs are that six pack isn't going to show if you cover it up with a layer of fat. Running, biking, swimming, stair climbing, jumping rope, tennis, volleyball, dancing, squash or any other activity that gets you moving and keeps you moving is a great way to burn fat. However, a cardio workout should be performed for at least 20 MINUTES to burn fat. Prior to this your body will simply run on its stored energy, which results in minimal fat loss. Cardio should always be done after your weight lifting workout. While lifting weights, you use stored, (carb) energy, thus, by doing cardio after weight training your body will have less stored energy to use and go straight into the fat storage for its energy use. The overall best way to shed fat fast is to do cardio(30 min minimum) right when you wake up. Your body will search for energy to use, when it finds nothing in your stomach, it will go directly to your fat storage for energy and the fat will burn up so fast!


Diet TipsKeep Metabolism Steady. Eating one small meal (such as a potato, a salad, etc.) every three hours that you are awake will not speed up your metabolism, rather, it will keep it going. Your metabolism goes and slows with your food intake and eating something small every three hours will keep that metabolism burning calories and will help you lose weight.


Eat Smaller Dinners. Cut down on the size of your dinner. If you're hungry, snack on fruits or other healthy, low calorie snacks. Large dinners tend to hurt a fat loss process because most people aren't very active after dinner. This is the basis for advice along the lines of ';don't eat anything within X hours before going to bed';. The claim that your entire dinner is stored as fat isn't entirely true (the process is more complicated than that) but the fact you don't move after dinner is enough to hurt your cause. You can offset this by eating a larger lunch or snacking healthily before dinner. Fresh fruits or vegetables are excellent choices for curbing appetite not to mention other health benefits. A handful of nuts might do the same. Drink a large glass of water before sitting at the table.


Eat More Fiber. Most people don't get enough fiber. The recommended amount is actually not that much if you eat a healthy diet. ';Fiber foods'; include whole grains, fruits and vegetables, and nuts and seeds. Other options are fiber supplements.


Eat Breakfast. Many people skip breakfast because they don't have time for it. Keep this in mind: You don't have time to skip breakfast, it's simply too valuable to skip. The fact that skipping breakfast messes up your concentration and other mental functions is beyond the scope of this article. The harm of skipping breakfast from a weight loss perspective is it makes you eat a huge lunch since your body hasn't had anything in the past 12 (or more) hours. When you eat a huge lunch you get that after meal drowsiness so now you're both unproductive and inactive. Cereals don't take much time to prepare and consume, and most of them are very healthy nowadays. If you are extremely pressed for time, consider grabbing a box of breakfast bars or a smoothie and throwing one in your bag when you leave for work or school. Some breakfast bars out there are also excellent sources of fiber.


Eat Smaller Meals More Frequently. This helps raise your metabolism too. It's not easy to do though since it's a relatively big change to most people's routines. But it doesn't have to be a full blown meal, simply eat often but less. A jar of nuts in the office will do just fine, grab a handful when you feel like it. Most fruits can last for a couple days without refrigeration, and if you have a refrigerator at the office, make use of it.





Drink More Water Everyday. Many places suggest 8 cups (2 L) of water a day. It sounds like an absurd amount of water, but actually, you can drink tea without sugar to make up some of the quota. In fact tea, especially green tea, rev up your ';metabolism'; (actually cause a temporary increase in calories burned).


For fat loss purposes, it is important to remind yourself that thirst is a much weaker stimuli than hunger. If you consistantly feel hungry after meals, don't immediately think that you need to eat more. You may simply be thirsty!


Needless to say there are many benefits of water. 69% of your body is made of it!





Source(s):





Lift Weights. The more muscle your body has, the more calories your body burns, even at rest. Many people are afraid of getting huge due to weight lifting. This is meaningless. You will NOT gain a lot of mass if you're not taking in a lot of calories as well. Also keep in mind that most of the huge people you see on TV or in print achieve that state by going on high protein and high carb diets. They increase their calorie intake specifically to bulk up. So the fear of bulking up should NOT be a reason to not lift weights. As a rule of thumb, the larger the muscle the more energy it will burn to sustain itself. Therefore the most effective muscle groups to work for fat loss are large muscle groups: thighs and hamstrings, the back, and the chest. You can also lift your body weight without going to a gym, through push ups, sit ups, chin ups, etc.Need some advice on teen dieting and workout plan?
i used to swim, and it thinned me out so much! i felt so great. i also used to run, and it was even more rewarding-- the only reason i stopped was because i didn't want to wake up early every morning.





make a plan, and stick to it. promise yourself you will excercise-- and be serious about it. write it down on the calendar or your planner and force yourself to do it. good luck!
KBob-


First of all, don't be embarrassed, that gets you nowhere! You are taking steps to try and get healthier and you should be proud of that! Secondly, based on those numbers you are not all that 'heavy'. Based your height and weight, your BMI (body mass index) is 25, which they consider 'overweight' but 24.9 is 'normal', so a goal of losing 30 pounds may not be healthy or realistic for you. ANYHOW...


The best way to lose weight is to move more and eat less. Obviously the junk food thing is good, but starving yourself will not work. Not only will you be miserable but your body actually burns LESS fat that way. Try to eat a balanced diet, with lots of fresh food and lean meats. Don't think of it as 'dieting' try to just be moderate in what you do. If you are too strict you WILL lose motivation. One fun way to eat well is to rate everything you eat. Savor the first bite and give it a rating 0-10. If it is an 8 or higher, its worth it, have a LITTLE more. If not- dump it, why bother! With the exercise thing, if you don't like the treadmill, why do it? Turn on some music and dance for 20 minutes, play basketball, swim, ride your bike- whatever floats your boat- but choose something you like, and mix it up. There are some good resources and ideas at this site too, that might help too!
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  • Teens!?!? Who are good at relationship advice??? Pleas help?

    My name is Alice and I'm 14 and I don't really want to post my question up here....but any teen who is willing to give good advice pleas e-mail me!!! Thank you!!Teens!?!? Who are good at relationship advice??? Pleas help?
    www.ihitch.webs.com. Go to this website. He can give you advice.Teens!?!? Who are good at relationship advice??? Pleas help?
    dont EVER FALL TOO HARD FOR A BOY

    Advice if you think your teen is crossing over into unsafe/unsavory sexual situations?

    daughter being too promiscuous and reaching out to a revolving door of boys. Hopefully not having actual sex, but at least heavy ';petting'; and has to be the beginning of a bad reputation at the very least. A cry for help or just sowing wild oats? Not happy with what might be happening but also don't want to push her further away into a worse situation.Advice if you think your teen is crossing over into unsafe/unsavory sexual situations?
    Depends how old she is tbh. No one wants to admit their children aren't little girls anymore, but if she's now at the age where she's becoming a woman then indulging in heavy petting is normal. I think it's unfair to label your own daughter as ';promiscuous';, and say she's going to get a bad reputation, especially when you have no evidence that she's actually having sex with multiple people.





    I agree that if she's 12/13 then perhaps her behaviour is too strong. However a 15/16 year old will indulge in kissing with boys. It's part of adolescence. It depends on her age what you should do about it.





    Just talk to her calmly about the dangers of unprotected sex and non barrier methods of contraception (how they may prevent pregnancy but not STIs etc) and trust her to make good decisions. I expect she's just a hormonally charged teenager exploring her sexuality, and won't continue for ever.





    If you think you may be seeing it worse than it is as she's your daughter (no one likes to think of their children doing things like this) then let it go. If you're genuinely concerned she is having underage sex then speak to her. But if she's a sensible girl trust her to make good choices.Advice if you think your teen is crossing over into unsafe/unsavory sexual situations?
    I think there is a difference between having a boyfriend, and making out with random guys.





    Any girl who does this, may have some abandonment issues and is looking for love and affection she feels she has missed somewhere along the line. It's not about having a reputation, it's an emotional problem.





    If your daughter has been through a divorce, or has issues with one or the other parent, this could be a cause. Maybe you could talk to the doctor for helpful advice on how to approach her ... maybe she could use some therapy, but again, i think that the approach could be very gentle, and the reason should not be ';because you are too loose'; --
    Im a guy teen and if I would want my mom to be involved it wold be cool if she could see me so she feels safe about it but when I flirt and hug and stuff for her to be cool about it! You know? And if it comes to more than that... U should break it up by bringing up somethng else todo

    If You Could Give Any Advice To A Person In Their Late Teens What Would It Be?

    You know when you think argh I wish I'd known that when I was younger or I wish I'd tried that...





    Cheers, much appreciated.





    ------Doesn't have to be about relationships put it in here as there weren't any suitable categories and this section is quite popular...If You Could Give Any Advice To A Person In Their Late Teens What Would It Be?
    Choose your major


    Study...!


    Choose good friends...


    Don't waste your time doing stupid things......time is very short !


    Enjoy every moment of your life!


    Be smart...!


    and be good...:)If You Could Give Any Advice To A Person In Their Late Teens What Would It Be?
    http://maggiepanion.tripod.com/








    This is for YOU !





    This is a wonderful little story of inspiration and faith for those who are having a difficult time moving on and letting go of someone or something in your life.








    LETTING GO





    It is good to be a seeker, but sooner or later you have to be a finder. It is only then that you will be able to give the gift of yourself to someone in the world who is willing to accept it. If you are trying to change or accept anything about yourself or your life, the best place to start is to learn the art of letting go. You will need this skill every day of your life, so learn and practice; practice and learn.





    Learning how to let go is the beginning of knowledge. Wisdom is found in the actual act of letting go. If you argue with that statement, think back to all the times you tried to let go and failed. Each time you failed, you learned something. When you finally made it, you were wiser, weren't you? You could know everything there is to know about letting go, but until you do something until you act on knowledge it is useless. Knowledge is learning how to let go, wisdom comes after you have done it.





    This is a little story about letting go and gaining strength. I have personally referred back to this story many times over the years and it has carried me through what could have been more painful and difficult situations and relationships in my life.





    Human nature can be a funny thing sometimes. You and I are so different, yet so much alike. I think sometimes you wonder if I really understand the things that you feel or are going through. YES, I've been there, usually out of fear, need or greed, nonetheless... I've been there. I have done exactly what you are doing. Like you, I usually had to be pushed out or have it become so unbearably painful that I have no other choice, then I would let go.





    I am often reminded of how a Gulf Coast Blue Crab grows. When it outgrows its present shell, it has to shed this old shell and grow a new one. IT HAS TO LET GO COMPLETELY, hold on to absolutely nothing all the way down to its fingers and claws. It has to let go of the struggle itself.





    But can you imagine having a choice in this situation? I am afraid I would want to hang on to the old comfortable shell until the end...wouldn't you? Just think of yourself, knowing that to live, you have to let go of your comfort. familiarity and protection. But also knowing that to stay in the old shell would limit you so to the point that eventually you would suffocate and die.





    Growth for the crab is very difficult. It has to risk shedding its old familiar shell, become a soft crab again and be vulnerable. To survive, it has to go to the bottom, go into the mud and be associated with other crabs also on the bottom. The surviving crab must learn to have faith that its shell will become firmer and larger each hour. It develops a faith in its pain while it is growing and maturing and learns to believe that it will be prepared for what is currently unknown to it.





    For me, letting go is an ongoing process. I don't know why it is so difficult to let go, until I begin to hold on to something or someone again. I not only hold on to people, places or things, I hold on to beliefs; beliefs that worked for years but are no longer useful to me.





    The crab story helps me understand that for the rest of my life I will be growing and like it or not, there with be changes taking place and with these changes there might be pain. What surprises me is that I can sometimes let go and experience the feelings with excited about what is in the future for me.





    Sometimes I can't wait to shed my shell, learn what I need to learn and get the old shell behind me. I hope that you can relate to some of this. When someone is trying to shed their shell, they are also trying to grow. If you don't let go, you may one day find yourself holding on to an empty, dying old shell. When we cling on to someone else, we slow him or her down and ourselves as well. To let go of another person, you must have no suggestions for them whatsoever; no arguments; no ';if you would only';; no ';someday you will';; no ';nothing!'; You have no advice for him/her, nothing more to teach or learn from this person. Remember, any struggle, any ';you ought to鈥榮'; any ';you shoulds'; any ';anything'; will keep you both where you are right now... struggling to get out of a shell that no longer fits. You have no solutions for anyone else at this moment in time. This is about YOU and YOUR growth.





    We simply must shed our own shells and grow. Remember, down to the ends of your fingers and claws, you must release any thought of holding on. Just think of letting go, growing stronger moving on with your life and experiencing what the world has waiting for you. You may let go just so much, feel the fear of the unknown and want to cling on more than ever before. Not so, this is your time to grow and be strong. Remember, you have no suggestions on when and how someone else should shed their shells and grow. This is about YOU and YOUR growth.





    When you finally let go or get kicked off enough times, you will go through the pain and begin growing your bright, clean, beautiful, new larger shell. This time you will be free. Free enough to swim wherever you choose, with knowledge enough to guide you there. You will have a shell large enough to feel confident in yourself and to grow within. You will be so beautiful that others will ask you how you got that way. They will want to learn from you how to let go of their old shells that have become too small to live in so that they too can grow and experience a wonderful life.





    An important thing to remember and think about, just to keep you humble. One day you will outgrow this beautiful new shell. However, each time you have outgrown a shell, you will go through some pain, but it will never be as difficult or as painful as the first time.





    I PROMISE

    Is there any websites that has teen advice?

    Yes there plenty. Try http://www.beinggirl.com and http://www.teenwire.com





    Hope I helped :)Is there any websites that has teen advice?
    www.teenhelp.comIs there any websites that has teen advice?
    u can check thius








    http://www.teenadviceonline.org/





    IT IS ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

    Parents of teens please read I need advice!!?

    My husbands sister, age 13, so she is my sister in law. *Kate* just turned 13 and you know how girls are at that age. THey never listen to anyone and think they are queens, the thing is my 4 year old daughter has severe alergies. I have to use none sented and none colored soaps and special lotions the doctor gives us because anything else will make her break out in a horrible rash. Now *kate* always puts chapstick on my daughter the result is swollen lips, reddness, cracking and sometimes bleeding. I have told everyone including *kate* in front of her parents that my kid cant have these things and they have all seen what happens. *kate* will say she didnt do it or that she didnt know, each time this comes up. I tell her parents about this and they say she didnt know or we will talk to her. and again it will happen. SHe will also use scented lotions on my daughter. She is the only one in her household that uses these items let alone has the items. And my daughter says that *kate* putParents of teens please read I need advice!!?
    Keep your kid AWAY from them. Especially your husbands ******* stupid sister, only your husband can give a good yell at his Deranged sister ( if that was my sister and she was doing that to my kid or pet, I would have given her a real good lecture a LONG time ago, and if she still wouldn鈥檛 get the idea I would ground her to ever seeing the child again till she turned 15) If you want your child to be safe keep it away from her, I know this can cause a lot of rivalry between family, but your child is more important and I鈥檓 telling you getting through to a teen and one who is ALREADY this stupid is going to take a long time and your child will suffer.Parents of teens please read I need advice!!?
    You simply cannot have your daughter around Kate alone. She is being extremely dangerous - and at her age she knows what she is doing to your daughter, she is not stupid. Sounds vindictive, maybe jealous.
    stop all visitation and keep your daughter away from them!!! they obviously don't care about her safety and that is priority
    Just don't allow your daughter to be alone around her. Or just stop going over there if no one can seem to discipline Kate. That ridiculous -- and she may even be jealous of your daughter. Stay home or don't leave alone.





    You are good because I would have whipped my sister-in-laws ';a@@'; after the second time she put something allergic on my child. 13 is still a child but one who knows better!
    Try this. get photographs of a childs lips similar to your daughter that looks the way her lips do after an incident. I say to do this because you don't want to have your daughter go through the pain just for photos. show these to your in-laws and tell them ';Yes, it is that bad'; explain to them that you would like to include them in their granddaughter's life but, until they realize and stop endangering her, she will not be a part of their life. It sounds like your husband supports you which is good and it might be best to have him be the one to explain this to them. I hope it works out for you.
    Do not, I repeat do not , take her over there period. I would be outraged. For the safety and comfort of your daughter, i think they should not be able to be a physical part of her life untill they are committed to doping what is absoultely best for her, even if they dont think its that big of a deal..... which it is!


    Heaven forbid she was allergic to peanuts, in which i have heard that you entire throat can swell and suffocate you till you cant breathe. :(
    Maybe';Kate'; is feeling left out. She may feel as if the baby is getting all of the attention. I have a 14yr old who acts up sometimes. I sat down and talked to her about it. Talked to not at, there is a difference. She told me that bad attention is better than no attention. I try to spend a little extra time with her without my oldest or youngest. This has helped a lot. As for the adults I don't know what to tell you accept to agree with the others and stay away.
    Wow! I'm shocked that your in-laws are so unaware of the dangers of allergies...My son has a nut allergy and has to have an epi-pen wherever he goes..Allergies are no joke..and you really need to get your point across...no matter how hard it may be.. or keep your daughter out of their house until they can respect your wishes not to have anything put on her....that is ridiculous and you need to put your foot down...It could become a dangerous situation for your daughter if she was to go into anaphylactic shock...You and your husband have to get this under control immediately...Good Luck!
    easy fix, stop leaving your daughter alone with ';kate';. She cant put anything on her she isnt suppose to if you are there. Stop taking your daughter to their house untill they get it through there head. Next, teach your daughter, since she is fairly old enough to start learning, that no one is aloud to put lotions or chapstick on her unless it is you or dad doing it.
    Keep your child away from them...period. If/when they ask why you can tell them.
    What I would do is the next time that your daughter ends up with swollen lips or another allergy reaction because of ';Kate';, take your daughter to the doctor, then get a copy of the charges for the doctor visit and present it to your in-laws, saying:





    ';I have talked to you over and over about this, and you really don't seem to understand just how serious it really is. Yes, it is serious. Here is the doctor's bill to prove it. Since you have chosen to ignore my repeated requests for help in the matter and decided not to discuss it with Kate and make her stop, I think it is only fair that if I ever need to take little Missy Sue Ellen Anne to the doctor again because of allergic reactions brought on by Kate's interference and stubbornness and your lack of concern, that you pay the bill each time, as well as any costs for prescriptions, and Heaven forbid, reconstructive surgery later in life if this leads to permanent scarring. You are on notice.';





    Yes, it's a hardball approach, but these people sound like they're dumb as rocks and won't understand any other kind of approach.





    Good luck.
    Im GRANDMOTHER AND RAISED 10 KIDS I say if they cant go by ur rules and ur daughters safety then they dont need to see her till shes old enough to make them choices your job as a mother is to protect her at all costs
    Tell them that you can no longer come over to visit them because they are putting your child's life in danger by not controlling their daughter.





    There is NO excuse and NO reason to not punish *Kate* severley for what she is doing.





    I would be running from those in-laws like they were anthrax.
    Sorry..i really dont know how to answer your question but it sounds like your husbands parents need to learn to respect your wishes and teach their ***** of a daughter to listen!
    My God how absolutely rude can they be? I am so sorry you are having to deal with this.





    My honest opinion is cut the family out all together. When they ask why you aren't calling or visiting or allowing them to visit, tell them it's because it's the only way you can seem to keep your daughter SAFE. Sure they may be insulted and taken a back, but it's your daughter and her safety is of the utmost priority... period. Once they realize you're serious about cutting them out, they should get the hint. If they still seem to not care, then just pat yourself on the back for getting rid of the threat against your daughter. Clearly they have no respect for her welfare and as a child who depends on adults for guidance, they're setting an atrocious example.





    I wish you the very, very best!
    I had the same problems with my ex's mom she was a nut. we eventually broke up and I left town. He was a momma's boy and we lived accross the street from her. just move. you don't need to put your girls life in danger for their happiness.

    ADULTS:what advice would you give teens today?Remember, they (as you did!) respond to real advice, not sarcasm

    We have 'been there, done that', and suffered/enjoyed it. What experienced advice can you give our future generation?ADULTS:what advice would you give teens today?Remember, they (as you did!) respond to real advice, not sarcasm
    1. You are who you are, and you can't be anyone else. Trying to act different to fit with a certain crowd will only make you feel phony, and trust me, they'll usually see your true colors anyway. You won't be happy faking it, trying to be someone you're not, and your self esteem will take a hit because deep down, you'll know that people don't like you for who you really are (cause you're not acting like YOU). I'm pretty nerdy (like to spend time on google answers, lol), a book worm, very interested in science, low tolerance for gossip and small talk, but I'm from a small town, and the group of friends I was in from K-eighth grade didn't fit me at all by the time I got to high school and knew more who I was. I realized we were different, these people and me, but I didn't have the guts to break away and seek out new friends (it was a small high school, so changing social cliques was no easy thing). In ninth grade, I would watch certain TV shows, pretend to be interested in certain things, dress a certain way, even change how I would usually talk to fit in with my ';old'; group of friends, so I wouldn't have to make new ones. It was a disaster for me, not socially, but personally. I felt like I couldn't be myself (I wasn't), and I felt like a fish out of water all the time, even with these old friends. Eventually, I did change cliques, and I was so much happier. Even today, sometimes there's pressure at work or in social situations to fit a certain mold, and it's way better to just be you.





    2. Know yourself. Take time to figure out who you are, what you like, what you want. Try not to look at yourself as one of your crowd of friends; look at yourself as an individual, and explore your own interests. In college, you probably won't have most of the same friends you do now, and if you do, they'll most likely be at different schools. Your whole life, you're going to need things to sustain yourself when you're alone, you're going to need to know who you really are to find out how to make yourself happy and fulfilled. Try everything once. Keep an open mind. Do as many challenging things as you can. Work on yourself as a person. Be brave. Be the first one to stand up for something, to wear a new style, to chane the way things are done. Not only will you become a stronger person, you'll become more interesting and admired.





    3. Be kind. Everyone is delicate in high school, and people can only take so much. Teasing, mimicking people, making fun of things people can't help (a kid has a gray streak in their hair, someone has an alcoholic dad, someone else smells smoky or dresses badly because of their parents, someone else can't afford to buy school lunch, someone speaks with an accent, someone's ';dorky';, etc.) are all really hurtful. You may be the most popular, the most important, or even just more popular than a certain person now, but that person could be the next Bill Gates. People remember kindness, and you'll feel good about it later. Also, you'll feel really bad if, as sometimes happens, a picked-on kid does something bad (suicide, etc.), and you were one of the people that treated them badly. This might sound crass, but it happens. Last, you could really help someone, improve their life on a scale you may not know, just by being nice.





    4. Don't screw up your life. In twenty, even ten years, you won't feel as invincible as you do now, and you'll see how crazy people act in high school, not knowning, not thinking about the consequences. I knew a girl who, as a freshman, got asked to a field party by a hot senior. She got a little drunk, he got really drunk, and she later said she knew she shouldn't have gotten in the car with him, but she felt silly, a freshman at a senior party, asking to ride home with someone sober or calling her mom. She got in the car, they had a bad accident, and the damage to her organs has totally changed her life--for the worst. She has to watch what she eats, she's on steroids so she's always going to be overweight, she'll always have to take medicines, she can't have kids. All because she wasn't bold enough to tell the guy she wanted a sober ride home. It's silly! It's absurd. If you're going to have sex, ALWAYS use a condom. People get aids every day, people get STDs every day, people get pregnant or get someone pregnant every day. These are big things, far reaching, and you're too young to screw yourself up in these ways. Also, don't do drugs. I don't care how bored you are, how much you want to fit in, how much you want to try it just once--people get addicted, people screw up their lives. It's not worth it.





    5. This may sound silly, but if you haven't had sex, keep it that way. There's something wonderful about knowing you're a virgin, untouched, unaffected by the major emotional impact of having sex with people, breaking up with them, having sex with more people, breaking up again. If you're a virgin, you're your OWN, and you'll never have to walk past Sam a year after you've broken up, knowing he's seen you, been with you, probably talked about you to the other guys. You may think Joey or Todd or whoever is your one and only, but you have no idea how much you'll change in the next few years (I didn't), and it's a hundred times more fulfilling if you wait till you really, really know yourself, till you're older, know more what you want, and are more emotionally ready for that kind of thing. Plus, virginity makes you alluring, makes you attractive to the opposite sex, and, if you're in a crowd where everyone's lost it, they'll sooner or later be wishing they hadn't. Promise.





    6. Think of the big picture. In a decade, give or take howevermany years, you'll be in a different place, with different people, doing different things. You'll only have YOU, standing alone, doing any number of new and exciting things. The only things you'll have from your teenage years are memories (good or bad), experiences that made you who you are now, achievements that bloomed into opportunities, and maybe a few high school friends. You want the best for yourself, everyone does, so put good things into your teenage self. Do what makes you happy, don't act like a fool, make meaningful friendships, don't burn people unnecessarily, learn, achieve, love, take risks. Making a C or D or even a B might not seem like a big deal in tenth grade, but if you discover your passion as a twenty-year-old, at a college, or at a dead-end job, and it's something you can't even imagine now (medicine, rocket science, computer technology, psychology, design, film), you're going to wish you made the best grades you could. Be honest enough with yourself, insightful, forward-thinking enough to know that there's loads more to discover about you and what you want, and why do things that will hinder you down the road? The better you do of finding out who you are, what you want, and with the tasks you have right now, the more opportunities you'll have later. (I promise this is totally true.) The small things, like showing up late for class, acting irresponsible and rude at home, making a D in biology, could hinder you later--when it matters. (Examples: You really, really need seven references for the exclusive arts school you've decided you want to attend summer after senior year- they need to be glowing references, yet you only have two teachers who liked you, and that's only because you cliqued, not because you did exceptional work and were there on time. The teachers are grilled by your reference-checkers, and they end up saying you were a really nice boy/girl, but you *were* kind of late a lot, and you *didn't* do so well in their class, and BAM! you lost your chance at art school. Another: You've decided all you want in the world is a car, or a year abroad freshman year of college, and your bankers (mom and dad) don't trust you enough, don't think you're responsible enough, for them to spend thousands of dollars on you. When they say no, and it's because you didn't show them you can be trusted, it's gonna hurt. And that D in biology... what if you decide you want to go to Harvard and become a neurosurgeon in three years? Every little thing counts.ADULTS:what advice would you give teens today?Remember, they (as you did!) respond to real advice, not sarcasm
    hey um im a teen.. and it will help a lot if u dont critisize teens a lot a tel them that u undrstand and let them know that they can talk to u ..its really hard if u talk to an adult about serious things and they just want to tell u how bad u r..BE THERE FOR THEM AND LISTEN
    These days, there's too much pressure put on teens... too much stress can drag you down mentally, emotionally, physically... it can literally drain your strength!


    Get all the GOOD you can out of life.
    Some day you will know all you think you know right now about life and people's behavior. For now just listen to experienced people that has taken their life to success and happiness.
    Enjoy your teen days they fly by way too fast and stay in school lol.
    Stay in school, and learn everything you can about economics, and investments. No matter what else you study, that will make the biggest difference in your life.
    Dignity and integrity never go out of style. You can have fun, do what you need to do but always with honesty and self-respect because the decisions you make today will carry over to your adult life.
    1. Don't be afraid to fail. Sometimes you learn more from your failures than your successes. It is so much better to try something and fail than to spend a lifetime with what if's and if only's.





    2. Don't automatically reject everything your parents say just because they're your parents. Believe it or not, we were not put here to suck the fun out of your young lives. We love you. We want the best for you. Lord knows we're flawed and often dorky, but that doesn't mean we haven't learned some things that might be helpful for you to know.





    3. You'll never regret being kind, whether to your elderly great-aunt with the over-powering perfume or the geeky new kid at school who is too shy to look anybody in the face. Ultimately you want to be the person that inspires people to say, ';He's sooo nice!'; You'll feel better inside your own skin, and people will seek you out for all the right reasons.
    Enjoy your life and try to achieve a lot in your school work as your future depends on your school marks and work. I think I did barely enough to get by and enjoyed the social life of school but wished I would've worked harder. Don't make any ';life'; decisions that you would regret later. Even though it looks neat to be in a steady relationship it may just bog you down later on.
    find love and marry as young as you can


    have kids and live a great life!
    Whatever you choose to do in life, be realistic, constant and persistent.


    Realistic in the goal you set for yourself. Planning on gettin on American Idol and taking the world by storm? Well, make certain you have a good job for essentials to get you where you are going.


    Constant on all levels of preparation for the job and the dream. A journey is easier if you take more little steps. Try planning things now and ask adults you respect lots of questions.


    Persistent in the concept of don't quit. Too many teens throw tantrums, need anger management, get in special classes, and more. It counts against you for the rest of your life! ';Be careful of people you step on to get to the top, since you will see them on your way back down.'; You only get respect (sometimes) by giving it first.
    if you have to ask yourself if you should do something, then maybe you should not. Follow your heart. and if something feels wrong then it possible that it is. take time to be a teenager, these are the days you should enjoy. don't rush them. and lots of luck in your future!
    my advice would be: study self-esteem A LOT! it was poor or bad self-esteem and lack of self-respect that ruined my life from about 9 - 49. if only i had known the things self-esteem taught me when i was a teen!!!!!!


    IMO, if you have high self-worth and healthy self-esteem, your whole life is open to you because there are no 'hang ups' to stop you! sadly, this good self-esteem is not taught or passed on in many families which is why teens and other kids struggle so.


    if you were given a good self-esteem upbringing, you will already know what i am writing about and, if not, probably nothing I'm writing will make sense to you.


    when you sincerely like and love your self, the whole world likes and loves you too.


    how many happy teens do you know and how many grouchy teens do you know? what is the difference between them - SELF-ESTEEM!!!!
    Get over thinking that just because you and someone from the opposite sex have a couple of dates you have a ';relationship'; and that you ';love'; each other. It is very unlikely that it is love and if it becomes sexual too soon can wind up messing up a couple of young lives. Just be friends, allow those friendships to grow and prosper, take the time to learn just WHO that other person is rather than expecting them to remain the fantasy you have of who they should be. Give yourself time to grow up and become the great person you are meant to be before you wind up being someone else's mother/father and regretting not allowing yourself that chance. Don't try to become a ';grown up'; too fast...believe me it's not fun being one.
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  • Do you have any advice on job hunting as a teen?

    I'm 15 and looking for my first job. I'm in the process of writing a resume. Who are acceptable references? I'm fairly new to the area so the only people I can think of are all teachers...





    Thank you all for any advice, I really appreciate it!Do you have any advice on job hunting as a teen?
    You can start your own buisness as a babysitter. How about trying to give your services to friends and relatives. That is a good way to start. If you're good in a ceirtain subject, like history or science, you can place that also as part of your skills. You can even create a web page and have a journal of your work activities. That first step is great regarding asking reference from teachers. You can also find references from friends an family who are responsible adults. I wish you the best of luck!Do you have any advice on job hunting as a teen?
    A great part time job is doing Free Surveys Online. Its a Fast, Easy and simple way to make extra money. check this website for info and Proof of Payments http://bestearningways.com





    And download SEO software from this site for more earning.











    Keep using answers.yahoo.com

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    Teachers are the best references to help with your resume or go to myresumecheck.com it's pretty kwel and try for thee big stuff not any fast food restaurants try footlocker,Jewel-Osco,and even the big bother and sister club now they get paid like 17.59 per hour
    job hunting can be hard but if i were you i would start out with movie places like video store or theaters they are really good about hiring youth.let the boss know about thing you have done at school like club and also your gpa........but most like fresh young people....good luck
    Teachers, school counselors, and coaches make the best references, because they're the only ones to have seen you ';work.'; Friends, even adult friends, aren't that great of a reference for a young person.





    Find out where the other teenagers in your city are working. Those are probably places that have flexible scheduling. When I was your age, I started lifeguarding, which was great for me because when they really needed people was when I wasn't at school. (Plus they make more than most entry level jobs.) A lot of stores may not need many more night/weekend people, but movie theatres might. Restraunts that are popular for lunch (think places with drive throughs) may not need more night/weekend people, but dinner places (sit down places where you'll get tips) might.





    Good luck!
    Character referances from people you know are usually enough for a first job. Teachers, doctors, and family friends who have responsible positions.


    As far as the type of work, you can't be fussy for your first job. Supermarket or retail work is always a good start.It will help you build up some work experience
    Teachers are great references. Apply somewhere you might enjoy. Don't forget local car washes, video stores, malls. Don't just stick to fast food.
    you let the job come to you fill in all the job applications you wold like to work as and if you like the job if you get it you keep it sonic i think is a great place to start
    I started babysitting at 9, had a paper route at 10, and got my first job at 14. I was raised to believe that hard work was important to build character and to accomplish what you want with your life. It took me YEARS to get over this terrible lie.





    Throughout highschool I worked at numerous jobs so I could pay for things like clothes, food, and busfare because my parents had other things they wanted to do with their own money. This interfered with my studies tremendously, simply so that I could do menial labor for garbage pay.





    The workforce is tremendously exploitative. ESPCECIALLY to young people who have been conned into believing that work in itself is a good thing. Employers will overwork you, underpay you, and then give you zero respect for your trouble.





    If you want to put some extra cash in your pocket as a youth you should try something more honest like selling pot at your school. Be careful and don't get caught cuz its big trouble, but it's a better service to the community than flipping burgers at McDonalds, that's for sure.





    If you have any skills at this point in your life, like web design or music, then try and use those to earn yourself come cash. It won't earn you quite as much as the pot but it pays better than selling clothes in a retail store at your local mall, and gets you a lot more respect.





    If there is anything that you want to do with your life, or a direction that you want to take things in, then you whould absolutely be doing that and don't waste one second of your time on working for some loser who owns some boring business and wants to pay you pennies for the right to trash you and boss you around.





    Some examples might be art, dance, programming, writing a zine, whistling, baking, anything that you like to do. Don't worry if it doesn't pay you anything to begin with. If you love it and you keep doing it then eventually it will lead to a nice payoff.





    Enjoy yourself and I wish you a great beginning to what I hope is a long, productive, and successful career.
    do not put family. if family is put as a reference, it shows that you are unwilling to go outside familiar boundries





    go for a grocery place, whatever it may be. this allows simple excercise(alot of walking) and alot of human relations and interaction with new people.





    also check what the age limit is to work. some states, if you are 15 or maybe even 16 or younger, you need a workers permit from your school guidance counselor that will be signed by a parent as well.

    I pretty much need halloween help for teens? and some costume advice? :D?

    so Halloween is coming up :D


    %26amp;%26amp; im so excited. b/c i get to hang with mi friends =]


    and the thing is, i don't have a costume =[


    well, b/c i don't want to get a costume.................l...


    me%26amp;%26amp;mi friends are like creating sumthing, ya know?


    %26amp;%26amp; well, i don't know what to be....=[


    im so confused =S


    i mean, should i be a zombie? ya know, like, wear reg. clothes and put make-up zombie thingie?lol


    or what?????


    **its just me%26amp;%26amp;mi friends trick-or-treating teens :D still acting like kids for halloween!lol**


    but, i don't want to dress like in a kid costume, if that's what u think im trying to say.lol =]


    idk what to do..........................


    ok,


    ADVICE PPL!lol


    thanx very muchacho's.lol [means much, duh.lol]


    ok,.........................


    haha


    xoxo,


    tiff :DI pretty much need halloween help for teens? and some costume advice? :D?
    you should wear a costume!!! On Halloween day you can get creative and dress how every doesn't matter!!! but i would wear a costume!!!I pretty much need halloween help for teens? and some costume advice? :D?
    umm....how about a disney princess?
    Think simple..and depending on what you will do that night, practical. With current retro themes, you could always turn into a really cool hippie....jeans, head band across forehead, anything fringe with tiedye tshirt. Or if you prefer punk or goth....dark makeup, lots of metal accessories - just look for pix on web to help guide. Always old favorite is a gypsy which would be easy with current ethnic clothing trends, flowing, gathered patterned skirt, peasant or embroidered shirt, LOTS of costume jewelry (Goodwill or raid someone's jewelry box), add shawl and big hoop earring...done. Most of these could be done by raiding yours or someone's closet (if they agree). Good luck, have fun and keep it safe - K?
    BARBIE!

    Advice for moustache shaving for young male teen?

    Has sensitive skin and has therefore been delaying the inevitable. Is it true shaving will stimulate the hair to grow faster and thicker? Should shaving be put off as late as possible? What method do you suggest - foam and razor or electric shaver? Any sensible advice welcome.


    Thank you.Advice for moustache shaving for young male teen?
    Razor is the best. Electric always made my face break out. A good quality razor like Gillette Fusion or Fusion Power (what I use). I also use Edge gel for sensitive skin. Like you said it's inevitable so might as well start. Splash your face with hot water before you apply the save gel. Good luck!Advice for moustache shaving for young male teen?
    No, shaving does not make hair grow back thicker or faster. Complete myth. It looks thicker because you've lopped off the fine, tapered end of the follicles. It looks like it's growing faster initially after shaving because the contrast is greater between smooth and stubble than it is between stubble and longer stubble.





    The incorrect thinking also derives from the fact that as one ages, one's facial hair grows in thicker and faster. And as one ages, one begins to shave. But correlation does not imply causation. Logic 101.
    I would suggest u start with a good shaving cream, something for sensitive skin (THere are loads of options out there) and a good 3+blade razor. (Never skimp on the razor. U get what u pay for) It will probably seem that the hair comes in thicker after u start shaving, but don't worry about that. It's inevitable anyway. If u find that u don't like it, try electric. Let me kow if u have any questions. Ive tried it all as far as shaving is concerned. :)
    Yes, I'm sure shaving does tend to make the hairs grow quicker than it would do otherwise. I used a razor to start with - but be careful with sensitive skin - use enough foam. I now generally use an electric shaver for quickness although a razor will get closer.
    yes it grows thicker as you make the hair grow faster if totally removed





    you need to try each way of shaving that suits you until you find one that's feel good for you
    Try to trim it. I have the same problem.





    I trimmed it once and kinda messed up so i had to shave the whole thing off. It grew back faster and thicker so I stopped. It doesn't look really thick though.
    It's a myth. It doesn't come back thicker and darker. It does it on it's own. Go to http://www.snopes.com and search the question
    Yes, after shaving, it will come back faster and thicker.

    Teens: i need some guy advice, wanna help out a fellow teen?

    ok here it goes:





    i'm 14 and have been going out with a guy i really like for a month and a half. he hasn't kissed me yet. ( so gay, i know ) he is also younger than me....and has never been kissed. and i want him to make the first move. i kno he knos that i want to kiss him. and i don't think he dosn't want to kiss me. he seems like he wants 2. why do you think he is holding back??? what is a way to get him to???








    thanks.Teens: i need some guy advice, wanna help out a fellow teen?
    honestly if he's that shy then you might have 2 make the first move, after that first kiss he will feel more comfortable.Teens: i need some guy advice, wanna help out a fellow teen?
    hes probably scared hell do it wrong and you should do it when the two of u have just finished having a really good time
    he is either gay or he is prude there are guys like that out there.
    well hes probably nervous. hes never kissed any one before. give it some more time, or u make the first move
    Ask him
    ok i know you want to make your first kiss hes probally just shy if he isnt kiss you right ro in a weird way but just go for it
    Well most likely he's scared, cuz i mean iz his first kiss. Its always that girls want guys to make the first move, but as scared as they are, they never do. But if a guy is really in love with u no matter if he's younger or whatever he will make the first step eventually. %26amp; if he doesnt (which would totally suck) u have to make it. The result of that will be that the next time he will kiss u.


    Maybe u can also bring 'm in2 a romantic situation %26amp; then tell 'm that u really want 'm to kiss u, if he doesnt than u should really do it.


    The next time he will kiss u, for sure.

    Parents of teens I needs some advice, my son's bestfriend called me a MILF?

    My 15 year old foster son got a text message from his best friend, I check his text messages every night but tonight for some reason he didn't want me to, it was odd because he usually doesn't mind, when I finally got the phone from him he said ';M please don't be mad'; that's when I saw the msg it said ';dude, i'm spndng da nite yur mom is a MILF';





    So I told him ';James'; can't sleep over anymore. Was I right? should I just let it go? I just feel so awkward now. My husband thinks I should just let it go but it bothers me. How would you deal with this? thanksParents of teens I needs some advice, my son's bestfriend called me a MILF?
    If it was me I would just ingore it and be a bit flattered, I mean a MILF to a teen boy is a compliment, you hot momma :P..


    I would make sure when he is over though that you don't send any weird signals, and you are approiatly dressed (unlike in american pie.)Parents of teens I needs some advice, my son's bestfriend called me a MILF?
    i think you should just ignore it, its normal. he knows he doesnt have a chance. if it happened to me i would probably embarass the kid next time he came over by saying something to my husband in front of him like ';you should take me out to dinner sometime, you know im such a MILF';.
    Not something to concern yourself with, all pretty moms of teen boys get this. I too check my 15 year old sons text messages, he knows it and doesn't mind either. It is our responsibility as their parent.
    Why were you checking his texts? Anyway, that's a compliment, in the crude way 15 year olds are. Are you concerned he's going to hit on you? It's not a big deal and you shouldn't have snooped.
    Think of it as a compliment. Now if your son said it, be worried.

    Boxer Briefs? (teens who wear them, advice?)?

    Im 14, weigh 95 pounds, weist is 25'; around. I wear Large boxers in boys and I am thinking of switching to boxer breifs to try them out and i have a few questions. One, what size should i get if I want somewhat tight but not too tight? Im pretty sure my sperm count is normal and don't plan on sex til marrige, rumor has it, sperm count is effected, is this an issue? What brand do you prefer and what material? What can i buy thats affordable yet comfortable? Im thinking of getting Hanes.Boxer Briefs? (teens who wear them, advice?)?
    I would say Large or Medium, Sperm count should be fine, any brand is good Hanes work and any material take time to fined out what you like the most.Boxer Briefs? (teens who wear them, advice?)?
    Boxers? Yes.


    Briefs? Yes.


    Boxer Briefs? Ew. No.
    i think breifs are sexy:)
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  • CALLING ALL TEENS!! I need love advice!!!!!!!!?

    Ok, I'm 13... And a couple years ago, I went out with this one guy. I was only eleven so I broke up with him because he was a jerk to my friends. Well, we never really got over eachother.. and at the beginning of the school year, we almost went out, until this one annoying girl butted in. This guy is a HUGE flirt. But he and I have so much in common its rediculous. Plus, I just always find myself thinking about him. The thing is, he always flirts with every hot girl he sees. He wants to go out with me again, but he is afraid I'll break up with him. I want to flat out tell him ';I've changed'; and I want to just let him know that things are different now. I love him so much, and he doesnt realize how great we are together. Because his brain is in his dick at this point... But what do I do?? I want to move on SO BAD. But... its so HARD... I have SO MANY guys that like me. You dont understand. And I need an answer befor halloween because I'm going to see him at a party. Please help me!!! %26lt;3 NenoCALLING ALL TEENS!! I need love advice!!!!!!!!?
    im 13 too and tell him that u really like him and say hey im changed i wanna go out and then go on from there.CALLING ALL TEENS!! I need love advice!!!!!!!!?
    you say you've got so many guys that like you. why not go out with all of them? and after you've handed yourself out to everyone in the whole town, this guy you want advice about won't want you anyways. so whatever. your going to do it anyways. all girls do.
    it depends on who you date and its all peer pressure.

    Help! any teens please give me advice!?

    There is this boy I like, Donte is his name he is about 18 months older than me. I don't know how to just walk up and talk to him without looking like a stupid person. He is black and I am white which is why I haven't told my parent because I don't think my dad would let me see him because of that he doesnt hate black people he just dont think I should date or marry one. I really like him and I just don't know what to do please help me. Any advice will help


    I mean I really really like him. the first time I seen him he walked over to me and I asked him how old he was and his name. and he told me.


    I dont care about race either that does not make a person. but my father would not let me see him and i would have to sneek around to see him.Help! any teens please give me advice!?
    Hi. I'm not a teen, but I am a college student who is white and am engaged to marry a black man.





    Your dad may not hate black people, but there is obviously quite a bit of racism there if he expects you not to date/marry someone of a different race. Although this is a tricky situation sometimes with parents (on both sides of the fence), there are always ways to work around this issue.


    First of all, be friends with this guy and bring him around the house to meet your family. If they get to know him and see that he is a nice, quality guy, the odds are greater that they will accept him later as a boyfriend.





    You can message me if you want to ask me anything else.





    Good luckHelp! any teens please give me advice!?
    just figure out something you have in common and talk to him about it :) its really easy :) im white and a black guy liked me, and i kind of liked him too. my dad flipped out and threatened to send me to montana. so just talk to him, race doesn't matter, all that matters is how you feel , if you two actually get serious your dad will get past it. he will want you to be happy.
    EDIT: ^i live in montana, thank u^








    When you walk by him, make sure you poke him or at least touch him and go ';hey';.





    Guys normally pick up after that. When he says hey to you, sey hey back. take your phone everywhere with you, so when he gets his out, go ';you have a phone? i need your number'; like its no big deal.





    dont think of him as';Donte the god'; more like ';donte the cute guy';
    If your dad wants you to be happy, he should be able to overcome his racism and let you date who you want. As long as the guy makes you happy and doesn't hurt you, what's the problem? Ask your dad that question and see if his answer is justifiable.

    ALL teens that have moved-advice please!?

    okay, so my dad has been looking 4 another job 4 awhile now and he's getting closer 2 getting 1. but my mom says if he's offered 1 that requires us 2 move, we will. il b a freshman this coming school year and i really dont wanna move. if we do, it'll probly b next summer. advice?





    is it easy 2 make new friends at the high school level and how bout adjusting? does it take awhile 2 learn every1's name and stuff?





    what about u personally. how would u go about a new kid?





    please help





    thanx-i hope i wont need the advice but it's good 2 b prepared.


    luv u guysALL teens that have moved-advice please!?
    in highschool, practically everyone is new!


    the easiest way to make friends is to join a club or team.


    im sure learning the names will be easy because you will associate them with different things.





    being the new kid is always hard. being calm, confident, and approachable is the key.


    ggooood luck!ALL teens that have moved-advice please!?
    well i hav moved many times and it is quite easy to make friends.you just have to be urself


    and ur gonna adjust later after you move like maybe 2-4 weeks.


    it took me awhile to learn everyones name


    but then i got used to it ^-^


    im fine going about as a new kid

    [Teens] I need your advice. Please?

    Well theres this guy, we're super close friends. I met him a few months ago (about April), and since then we talk everyday, whenever I'm home. I usually stay up late into the night just talking to him on the phone/instant messenger. He says he misses me if we dont talk for more than a day ^-^





    I know its not in person yada yada yada.. But he's not a pedo or anything, yay for webcam. we're just friends, really close friends.





    He has low self esteem and frequently says 'When we meet you'll hate me,' 'You deserve better.' etc. (We were supposed to meet at the zoo next week.)





    And last night he says to me, out of nowhere 'You deserve better, I care about you alot.. I'd only hurt you. I'm sorry, Good luck with everything.'





    Now he's blocked me, wont reply to my txts/emails and wouldnt answer the phone when I called.





    Dont tell me to give up, I wont.





    I just wanted to know if I should wait a few weeks, then call/email again?


    If so, when? A week, two weeks, three?





    Or should I just show up at his house and start to cry uncontrollably? lol





    I really need help, I cant stop crying. :([Teens] I need your advice. Please?
    okay...this is gonna sound weird, but id actually be seriously concerned about him. withdrawal is a major sign of depression/suicide.





    you should talk to him about this...and get him help if possible[Teens] I need your advice. Please?
    My friend went through the same thing.


    UNFORTUNATELY, the reason the guy did that was because he had other girls in mind and didn't want to dump her like a douchebag. We found out by my friend making another account and seeing his status and profile and all that.


    She was heart broken.
    well first of all i think you should give it a few weeks. you should try to contact his friend or someone he knows and ask them to see whats going on. sorry, i dont really have any solutions for you :( . the fact that he keeps saying that you deserve better obviously means that he has low self esteem. this is just a thought, but maybe he blocked you because he didnt want to hurt you or maybe hes got a girlfriend and dosnt want to hurt you or his girlfriend (these are just random thoughts). and i think crying is just going to make it worse, sure you should think about him but crying isnt going to do you any better





    i really hope it works out :(
    Well he knows he better not as he will do things he should not and he blocked you so you do not meet as he would and could end up in jail when you got caught,. He is being smart so do nmot keep on! Go find a guy ioff line thats a teen and have a teen life. This is dangerous and you need let it go!!!!!!!!!!! Besides you said your just friends. Would you let your mom meet him? Would you tell your mom your going to meet him.? Would you share what he says with your mom? Then if you answered no to any of these you are in the wrong path and about to hget hurt!!!! My daughter was raped doing this and was missing for a day. It was so scarry and scared her to death. She thought after she was in the car and he brought a friend took her top 4 countys and when she got in the car she was made to lay down. Yeah that was a friend that she met on line and talked so sweet to her and had her so convinced that she was a great friend. So no do not do it !!!!!

    Teens: I need some advice please.?

    So i have this ex that i broke up with.


    he treated me bad and had others on the side.


    he still is constantly talking a bunch of mess


    and telleng everybody our business.





    and so my very close friend who knows all of this


    and him and her are like friends now .





    i know i cant control who she talks too;


    but idk it just erks me that my close friend is


    close with someone who i like hate.





    should i drop her or what?Teens: I need some advice please.?
    Dont drop her keep her so she can tell you what he has to say about you just so u know what he is saying but dont be all besties wit her cuz she could be phony nd tell him everything you say so watch u say or she could be tryin to hop on yo ex man nd turn against you nd try to cause a lot of drama females r a trip just kinda see where her head is at and watch what u say nd dont tell her yo businessTeens: I need some advice please.?
    wow, that would piss me off





    if it was just of me I would tell her that I would prefer if she wasn't friend with the guy but then she'd tell me that I can't control who she talks with and that he was a jerk to me but not her








    you can't ask your friend to choose between him and you so I guess you just have to support it
    She can have a life, %26amp; so can your ex. i see that its bugging you that she would exactly become close with someone you despise. But that really isn't your problem. You should just mind your business if you don't mind me telling you. i see no harm in her being a close friend to him. They aren't doing anything. So don't jinx yourself.





    You could talk to her, and ask her why she would do something like that? Or even think to do that. But, controlling who she can %26amp; cannot be friends with isn't cool either.
    I dont know how old you are but I even though I am ';lloydMOM'; I'd take a guess I could not be too much older than you and here is what I would say. Even at my age, people STILL ACT LIKE KIDS or LIKE THEY ARE IN HIGH SCHOOL. You will find as you mature that this will never go away. I have dealt with it myself. It takes a long time for someone to mature and it takes even LONGER for MEN to mature. Trust me. You should not worry about all this. You dont need the stress. It took me a year and half to figure that one out. I am now expecting his child and where is he? in jail. YOU CANT PREDICT THE FUTURE!! You can plan for the future the best you can but in the end you will see the only thing that really matters is that you are happy and someday your kids are happy. Let it go for now. true friends find their way back. True boyfriends turn into husbands. Have fun and dont worry!!!
    Drop Her But Slowly She And Him Could Easily Expose You Dont Piss Her Off Just Steer Away From Her Slowly. Yea Leve That ***** Alone She Fake An Unless You Fake Too You Dont Need Fake People In Your Life.Its Not Healthy
    just see how the time goes if they start to like each other then we have problems...

    Teens, I need your advice. What do I do?

    Well theres this guy, we're super close friends. I met him a few months ago (about April), and since then we talk everyday, whenever I'm home. I usually stay up late into the night just talking to him on the phone/instant messenger. He says he misses me if we dont talk for more than a day ^-^





    I know its not in person yada yada yada.. But he's not a pedo or anything, yay for webcam. we're just friends, really close friends.





    He has low self esteem and frequently says 'When we meet you'll hate me,' 'You deserve better.' etc. (We were supposed to meet at the zoo next week.)





    And last night he says to me, out of nowhere 'You deserve better, I care about you alot.. I'd only hurt you. I'm sorry, Good luck with everything.'





    Now he's blocked me, wont reply to my txts/emails and wouldnt answer the phone when I called.





    Dont tell me to give up, I wont.





    I just wanted to know if I should wait a few weeks, then call/email again?


    If so, when? A week, two weeks, three?





    Or should I just show up at his house and start to cry uncontrollably? lol





    I really need help, I cant stop crying. :(Teens, I need your advice. What do I do?
    Could it have been a joke and the guy realized he got to far into it? Or maybe you should try and contact him soon and reasure him that he is good enough for you.Teens, I need your advice. What do I do?
    heeyy :)


    omg yaaaa you should totally just like show up at his house to talk !!!!


    let him know that you care !!! :)


    or you could mail him something if you don't feel comfortable seeing him in person yet..... just keep trying to get a hold of him.... but don't go over board :P


    just text him saying good morning, and text him saying good night :)
    When a guy says ';You deserve better, I'd only hurt you, blah blah blah'; anything along those lines... 99 times out of 100 it's bullshit. He just wants to move on without you.
    Maybe who knows maybe he's right maybe you really are too good for him.


    In any case if he has blocked you %26amp; stopped all communication with you than that probably means, that he just wants to move on with his life without you.


    Who knows maybe you really could a lot better than him.


    So just try to move on %26amp; forget about him, because 30 years from now in the year 2039 you will probably won't even remember this tiny little episode because you will have moved on to much better things by then, so don't obsess over this guy because clearly this guy doesn't deserve your obsession with him, he himself has told you that.





    So please don't hurt yourself %26amp; just move on.
  • makeup show
  • TEENS I NEED SOME ADVICE?!?!?

    so me and her are over at my friends house watching a movie and shes sitting next to me. we had kinda been flirting during the movie so she keeps leaning in over her armrest and i guess she was waiting for me to make a move. I tried like ten times and didn't know what i was doing so i guess i wasn't saying the right things so then she'd seem to lose interest and she'd just kinda go back to sitting on her seat like normal. Then we'd flirt some more she'd get back practically hanging over my armrest then i'd mess up and she'd lose interest. This honestly must have happened at least 6 times and have no idea what to do here.





    Please help me.





    Note I'm 15 so i'm not doing anything that could be considered offensive. Another thing is i know i'm gonna get at least one answer saying just compliment her but like whenever if i try to compliment her i feel its just like gonna come off as creepy. i don't really know how to explain it but i just don't know how to make it not be awkward.


    TEENS I NEED SOME ADVICE?!?!?
    Well coming from a girl, who has been in the same situation as you. She probably ISNT losing interest, she is more than likely thinking she is looking dumb, or thinking you dont like her. We tend to bash on ourselves, idk why, we do though. So make a move, not a mac daddy move, a subtle sweet one, like complimenting somthing she did the other day. DO NOT compliment on the FOLLOWING things...





    Dont compliment on.....


    How she smells, it WILL come out weird and make you sound stalkerish.





    2. DONT compliment on our weight....just dont.





    Some great things to compliment are.....


    1.how she laughs, she will probably say she hates her laugh..but really she is glad you like it.





    2.her smile, again, she will say she hates it, but go ahead and do it anyways.TEENS I NEED SOME ADVICE?!?!?
    you should of tried to make a move. next time put your arm around her, hold her hand, or atleast play with her hair or something. lol you're so innocent it's adoreable. now make sure you flirt with her so she stays interested in you and doesn't feel like she's wasting her time.
    if you c tat she is intrested even for a second and you 2 are flirting then make a move on her just not a drastic one put your hand around her but not on her then move your hand lower and lower till you get 2 her shoulder .


    if you now how im explaining it





    good luck





    im also 15 so ya
    Well, i would put your arms around her because then she will lean it closer and you two will end up cuddling. Than when your ready or think that the time is right kiss her. But seriously cuddling is the best and it is a really good first move.
    lean towards her and move your hand toward hers, then slowly tickle her hand. If she likes you, she will get the picture and hold your hand











    mine?


    http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=Al9KRFQkRmXfhcX.dezKO2jsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20081103172004AAmBMoU
    next time, just go for it. don't try to be smooth, or anything. just look at he then go for it! :) please help me :)


    http://ca.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind鈥?/a>
    Just flirt with her. The awkwardness will wear off when she notices that you are reciprocating. Then you can ask if she wants to hang out with you again if all goes well.
    just keep being nice and being normal and maybe put your arm around her?





    good luck!





    help me??


    http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;鈥?/a>
    Pull the old yawn and grab. Just yawn and put your arm around her. it's unbelievably corny, but somehow they usually just look past it.
    just put your am around her dude lol,


    girls; please answer my question


    http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;鈥?/a>



    go for it


    whats the worst that could happen.... yall arent dating she cant break up with you for it


    shes def interested.... she could be one of those girls who like making you chase them...... that is pretty much every girl lol
    just take a deep breath and give her a kiss. if she says no then you dont loose anything she wasnt your girlsfriend before the kiss anyways so you either win or things remain the same
    I think she wants to kiss if you are nervous tell her you are nervous.
    just play it out. shes practically throwing herself at you
    just keep trying
    Just relax. You're nervous, I know you are. I've felt that same way too with my girlfriend (well, before she became my girlfriend). She gave me hints that I should make a move, but I didn't. I just kept telling myself to be myself, and relax. Next time she and her friends came over for a movie, I made my move. (It was a sad love movie) I put my arm around her and she just leaned on me. After the movie, she told me that she had fallen in love with me and that I did the right thing.








    So bottomline, just be yourself and relax! You can put your arm around her if you want or just talk to her (flirt). Aside from that, you could ask her friends if she likes you. If she does, then make your move! Don't be scared, if she does reject you, then don't take it in so much. There are a lot of other girls there in the world.





    Good luck!
    i remember this situation. She wants you to make a move but she doesn't want it to be awkward either so she keeps going back. Keep trying. Putting your arm around her would be a good move. or if thats too much then just put your arm up against hers and even tho it sounds odd i love this just grab the like side of her thumb or finger and like rub your finger back and forth. she'll probably fix her hand in yours. if she doesn't just do it your self. After you get that far then make sure to keep going and to keep making moves until she is comfortable to do this herself.

    Teens...please give some advice?

    It's for a sociology/writing project in which we name fictional people and create storylines. What do you think of these names? (They're in their teens!!!!)





    Girls: Stella, Chlo茅


    Boys: Kris, Tyler





    Second of all, based on given personalities, should Stella be with K or T? Should Chlo茅 be with Oliver or Spencer? (dating wise) See below.





    Given personalities: Stella--eclectic, fashionable, lives in Chicago, into chemistry, fencing, brunette


    Chlo茅--blonde, model, into mathematics, karate, being intelligent





    Kris--from New Jersey, dark hair, funny, cute, deep, ';expected'; to be with Stella


    T--cute nerd, from Chicago, hilarious, bffs w/Stella, in2 chemistry, karate


    O--rebel, James Dean type, smart, wears leather jackets, dark hair, from Britain, met Chlo茅 on vacation in the Hamptons


    Spencer--blonde, from Manhattan, tall %26amp; fit, into sports like karate, wants to work on Wall Street, cute yet intelligent, known Chlo茅 forever





    ThanxTeens...please give some advice?
    It sounds like a great story line you have. I think Stella should be with Tyler to give a twist to the story she is expected to be with Kris. I think that should should change the spelling of Kris to Chris, though.Teens...please give some advice?
    Stella%26amp;%26amp;Tyler, they have alot in common and best friends are always the cutest couples, unless they break up..


    andd, Chloee%26amp;%26amp;Spencer because it could kinda be like one of them falls in love with the other and they are actually both in love but neither know how the other feel until one night they kis or something and likee it be really cutee
    put a twist on the best friends, stella and tyler * chloe and spencer, and have the girls w/ other guys, and they find out they like eachother cuz they can be themselves around them. or u can use that storyline for one of the couples, and have chloe w/ oliver or watever
    Try joining a dating service. Nearly all are free to join and it's a nice way to meet new people. http://www.cutelocal.com/index.php?state鈥?/a> I bet there are lots of New Jersey singles online that you can chat with.
    I think Stella should actually be the blonde and hav Kris be her bf... and Chole should b the brunette and she should have Spencer be her bf





    but thats in my opion
    stella with tyler because....best friends make the bert boyfrinds...


    chloe with oliver.... i just see it happening
    aww, i agree, they should both go with the guys they know best....but Oliver sounds intruiging for Chloe!!!

    Teens I need your advice thanks ?

    My friends are all joining this company that you pay ten dollars a month to join. If you join and ask friends to join then you get one dollar for each person who joins after you. I told them it was a MLM and yes it will work only if more and more join. So I say hey it was just ten dollars. Well my first check from the company was 250 dollars so I guess it is ok what do you think? I will make this much each month without doing nothing more than telling others and giving my ten dollars I think it could be good. I will get that new car in no time with this.Teens I need your advice thanks ?
    well sure go ahead, do it.

    TEENS I need love advice... SERIOUSLY <33333?

    Ok, well this guy, Tony and I went out a couple years ago this november. (I'm 13) And since we broke up, we never really got over eachother. I cant stop thinking about him. We almost went out again this year, but this other butted in. He wants to go out, but 1, he's afraid of commitment, and 2, he is afraid to get hurt again.





    I love him so much, I just... I dont think I can live without him. And all you love skeptics who think I'm too young to even know what the word love means?? You have no idea how I feel. He and I have absolutely EVERYTHING in common. Its REDICULOUS. I want to tell him I've changed and things are different, but I dont want to beg!! I like him SO MUCH.





    What do I do?? I cant move on! There is a bunch of guys that like me, but they may seem GREAT for other girls, but to me, they're icky. All I want is HIM. He just flirts with every single hot girl he knows. There is a party this halloween at this one house, and he is going. Should I do something then? Or should I talk to him?





    He called me today like he usually does, and out of the blue, he asked, ';If you and one guy could live alone on Earth, what guy would you want to be with?'; I said I didnt know, then he brought up his friend Ben. Because I gave him my number. I gave him my number because I wanted to skateboard with him. NOT because I like him.





    Tony would not drop the subject. Then I got pissed at him and he hung up. He wont answer any more. UGH!! I want to tell him I want to be with him. What the HELL should I do???TEENS I need love advice... SERIOUSLY %26lt;33333?
    i like a girl and haven't told her yet.


    meet him at school and talk to him.TEENS I need love advice... SERIOUSLY %26lt;33333?
    i know how it feels to be completely head over heels for a guy.


    i'm 15 and i've gone through every heartache and confusion you can think of.


    i think you should tell him.


    i always made the mistake of hiding how i felt.


    it feels good to just say how you feel.


    it seems like he feels the same about you that you do of him.
    tell him about it.


    send him a cute text or drop him an email.


    or here's a thought, talk to him at school.


    when you're straight-forward with someone it really gets the point across.


    if you tell him how you feel? what's the worst that can happen?


    he'll reject you, and you'll fall in love again.


    :]


    hope i helped.
    You should try to talk to him about it. Explain that you didn't mean to give the one guy your number to go out. Also, apologize for breaking his heart when you guys broke up before, and try to get him to trust you enough so he won't think he'll get hurt.
    Tell him, people make mistakes, you probably got scared in your relationship and backed out before you got hurt, well maybe it hurt him. And he thinks your over him, but tell him how you feel. Maybe he might dump his other girl, and go for you. If he really loves you he would.
    even though i am a guy im also 13 and i know EXACTLY how you feel, except my girlfriend just didnt like me anymore. what you should do is let him know about your feelings for him, and ask him to change the reason you broke up with him for.
    You should tell him what you just told everyone... how you feel.. You need to know if he feels the same way. If you dont say anything you'll go on wondering what would have happened if you had done it differently. He responded that way to you giving a freind your number because he is obviously jealous. TELL HIM HOW YOU FEEL!
    okay, I was in this problem before. I broke up with him because my friend told me. I said this is crazy, I told him how I felt and he still had something for me but it was hard to build that trust together but we are still going out . go for it
    Awww, you should have answered when he asked you, that was your chance, he probably would have been all like ';me?!!!!!!!!!!?';





    Yes, go talk to him at the halloween party.
    Whoever said it's too long is pathetic. Anyway, I know how you feel. Just tell him when there's a chance that doesn't make you too uncomfortable. Pass a note at lunch and tell them to 'read it later' or 'not out loud.'
    if he wants to go out tell him you do too. but i think you were too young if you dated him a couple of years ago. and maybe too young now.
    http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;鈥?/a>
    alrightt, i'd just give him some time to cool down, plus try to talk to him in person and explain why you gave him your number.
    ohhh boy. you are 13 my dear. I highly doubt you are even aware what romantic love is. it's probably puppy love and trust me, you WILL ger over the guy.
    You can wait a few more years until dating..


    you can date now, but if other people like you, then thats not a bad thing..



    Haha, you went out a couple of years ago and you're 13 now? You're barely a teenager, just chill.
    go back to the sandbox


    children should not be dating...


    at your age, are you even sexuall, mentally mature?????
    Either tell him you want to be with him or get over it.
    Pull off something amazing, that shows your love for him...like painting out his name on your school using your blood, or use his name as a verb (';Want to go Tonying later?'; ';Hells, yeah!';).
    would make an excellent romance novel :)





    ...and yes...u r too young...its just an infatuation.
    A couple of years ago, as in you were 10 or 11? And dating?





    :X
    yes but no sex it would mess up your life up i am telling you if he really LOVES OR LIKE YOU
    Wait a few more years before you start dating. You dated someone at 11?!
    that is too long to read... Sorry.



    CALL HIM BACK... DONT GET MAD AT HIM! CONTROL UR ANGER!!
    Just.. tell him the truth and see where it leads. Boys will be boys.. And in this case, he's a young.. boy.
    I need you in my pants



    TRUUUSST MEEE!! .. when ur 13, its better to try and not let anyone know who u like....
    just tell him ur heart


    %26amp; c wut he does


    u'll regret it if u dont %26amp; he ends up w/ sum cheesy girl


    srsly



    im him its what people normally do
    im ur age and he seems protective [x.


    just make him jealous gurl works every time

    Need parenting advice from parents of teens...?

    My oldest son is 16, and he has always been a really good kid. Lately he has started running around with a boy who I don't approve of - they are getting in minor trouble with the law, fighting, etc. He's also been running around with a girl who I know is not a virgin, her mom pays for her motel rooms and gets her condoms and beer. I know if I forbid these relationships he will sneak around. How can I pursuade him that these kids are not the best choice without damaging our relationship? His dad says I need to let him learn on his own and make his own decisions. I'm just not ready to let go just yet. Is there anything I can do?Need parenting advice from parents of teens...?
    Who is the parent here? He should not be running around at all. He is only 16. All his friends should be screened by you and if you do not approve of them he should not be seeing them. When he is an adult he can pick all his own friends. He is not an adult yet and you need to pull in that rein. You are just asking for trouble giving him so much freedom. You are not your child's friend, you are his parent. If he has been in trouble with the law you have good reason to ground him and set some strict house rules now before it is to late.Need parenting advice from parents of teens...?
    ~Falls face forward onto her keyboard~


    Oh dear god, I'm moving out of the country when my children become teens.





    I know you are in hell right now, I think you should do all that you can think of to take control. You CAN disallow him this life he is choosing. Your time is running out though, but don't let that deter you from acting for HIS OWN BENEFIT today!





    I wish you luck!!
    He's only 16, you don't have to be ready to completely let go. If I were you, I would put my foot down, you have two years to go until he possibly moves out of the house. Do you really want to deal with that for 2 years. And tell your husband to get on the wagon, you can't do it on your own. What kind of mother would buy her daughter a hotel room with beer and condoms. How old is this girl, if I knew about that I would be calling social services. Try talking to a counsouler or a support group that could give you ideas and suggestions as to what to do. This is where the expression TOUGH LOVE comes into play!! Nine chances out of ten he won't listen to you, you are gonna have to find a neutral party that can talk to him. Send him away to a camp of somesort, make him get a job, do something cause if you don't it may be to late.
    i am not a parent but his dad is right. unless your son is involved with drugs you need to step back and let him fall on his face. maybe a night in jail will scare him senseless. it is hard to let go but sometimes its best to let them live and learn.
    I think he has to figure it out for himself. Let him nkow u dont approve but respect his choices. If the girls mum buys her condoms at least she does not have STD's and is practicing safe sex
    they like that stuff but remember when u were a teen
    Wow, I didn't read this one...it tells the whole story. I just answered your other question about the girl. You really need to set some boundaries and start acting fast, or your teen is going to spin out of control. First, The best advice is getting him ontrack with God, but that takes some time and effort from you and your husband. Second, your husband and you need to be on the same page as Parents.


    Third set some curfews, rules, and consequenses and follow through with them. Tell him you want to be able to trust him, but running around with these types of friends are going to lead you not to trust him.


    You need to cut off the friendships of these two people as well.


    And yes he needs to learn to make his own decisions, but he needs to be given the skills to do that by his parents. Sounds like the Dad needs to start steppin up, get into the picture and start setting some laws down for his son.
    Without patronizing him or talking to him like he is your child, talk about his behavior in a very grown up way, such as a boss would talk to an employee. Just talk about the behavior and assess his awareness of the (possible) consequences of his new friendships. Ask him if he is ready to face the consequences and tell him that his friendships are his decisions. It is true that kids need to learn important lessons like this one on thier own.
    His dad is right... He has to live an learn... Just keep him away from hard drugs, I dont want him to end up like me... Weed is okay on weekends, alcohol is okay on weekends...
    One question...who is the parent? You or him? Answer...YOU! If you don't want you son hanging with those people then you need to put your foot down. How would your parents have dealt with you?
    if i may join in, i may not be a mother of teen yet..just got 5 and 7yrs boys. i have been through this with my dad. he always talked to me in `a father style way' you know what i mean. lots of do`s and donts, i understand their point and i love them but being a teenager then, what i must/need to do is the least i can`t then. Probably im a girl and the eldest, but it doesnt matter. every teenagers goes on the same process.





    and now i got an early marriage at the age of 20. somehow i felt that they also admit the fact that they had mistakes on dealing with me when i was teen. what i wish them to be with me then..they are now to my brother, and they stick a lot to each other, they are best pals, anything that a parent should know my dad knows. would you believe that there are times that my dad and him peak girls on the beach for some fun. and sometimes open up girl`s stuff with both of them and shared their experiences. and my dad drinks up with his friends too, in that way my dad makes some simple investigations with my brother's friends. and he can give his advices too at the same time.





    the best person who can do so with your son's problem is your husband. as the others says you cannot just let him go.. not yet the right tym.. and you can still do a lot of strategies.
    'Well you can only do so much...Just tell him you are there for him and explain to him that you trust him and he should know what is good and what is bad. A lot of times you tell your kids to stop hanging out with someone that you don't approve of but instead of listening to you they do the opposite. So it's always better to let them find on their own, remember you can only learn from experience. Regarding that girls mother, I'm a mother of 3 girls 13,15 and 17 and I don't see myself doing anything like that for my girls(paying for motel,beer and condoms) she is acting like she's like a friend not her mother! I am against teen pregnancy, its ridiculous that now days you tell them everyday, you see so much advertisement and the consequences of having a baby. I don't understand how can parents tell their kids ';its OK...have the baby- I'll help you take care of that baby'; NO it's not OK...there is so much in life for teenagers to do not get stuck with a baby at a young age! Like your husband says he will learn to make his own decisions.
    increase your family activities together...fun stuff, so that he feels it's a positive environment to spend time with family. it's normal developmental progression for kids to start breaking away from their parents at this age.





    however, that doesn't mean they need to move in a direction that can get them in trouble. you need to state the family rules, and what the consequences are for breaking them. say what you mean and mean what you say.





    catch him in the act of good behavior and acknowlege it: great job getting home before curfew, i appreciate the effort you're making to follow the rules, etc.





    kids have a need to know what their boundaries are. this doesn't mean they won't test them. i never got into grounding, as it meant i had to be grounded also. taking away or restricting privileges can be more impactful. make sure that the loss of privilege is stated in the consequences.





    as your son understands how much fun it is to be with family, and that rules and boundaries come from a place of love and guidance, he will make better decisions and choices for himself. best of luck to you.
    You ask the question is there something I can do? yes you can pray that all the work you did up to this point will stick and he will come to his senses, I am never surprised at mommies, when their little boys or little girls stop wanting to play with toys and find other things of interest. If a parent has done their very best to TEACH and RAISE a child, If the Child is not a BAD SEED, you can only sit back at the age of 16 and hope to see them make the choices that will allow you to breathe easier, however at the age of 16 wondering if there is something you can do, no simply look back at what you have done and hope it was enough.....
    This is a difficult one. Children/teens need to see their own error of their ways and screw up and then they'll understand that they were wrong to do these things. But if he is in trouble with the law... that is another matter... things could go from just minor to major and then he's in deep you-know-what. There are times for parents to let their kids make their own mistakes and learn from them... but then there are times to step in and set guidlines and steer him away from the 'bad/detrimental things'





    Does he have an uncle or older cousin that you could have speak with him and advise him of the consequences of his actions. No kid really wants his parents to be 'advising him etc' as it may come off as naggy or annoying or whatever. But if an uncle or cousin speaks with him. He may see the error of his ways.





    As for the mom of the girl who pays for her motel room, condoms and beer. I don't know what to say about that situation... someone who obviously doesn't really 'care' about her daughter. She obviously condones sex %26amp; underage drinking... (shakes head) Don't understand her.
    Beat the living Hell out of him... Before he ends up in prison! What are you waiting for ! ? ! ?





    Use your best belt....
    You have reached the point where you have a child/man, and no matter what he says, he still needs your guidance. Maybe now more than ever. Try to maintain your cool, and treat him like an adult. Like your husband is saying, he has to learn consequences and accountability. Be consistant, tell him what the consequences will be if he does xyz, and then if he still makes a choice that you've warned him about, make sure you serve the consequences on him. Talk to him, tell him you love him, and tell him even though he is nearly grown - he isn't - and that he is going to have to answer to his folks when he goes nutty. Testosterone. Wildly surging emotions. Frontal lobe development! Its no fun being a teen. Be strong right now, he is pushing limits, as he should really- he is starting to discover who he is, apart from being your son. You mention that he has always been a really good kid-he still is. Trust him, trust all that you have done as his mom, and know that your relationship will survive if you can both maintain your love and respect for each other.Good luck!
    i know this isnt what you want to hear but, he'll learn from his own mistakes. I mean you are who you are now because you made mistakes. let him live and learn. if it gets to the extremes to where his life is being endangered than thats when you should take some action. dont scold him cause that will only make matters worse. talk to him like an adult and and give him advice. dont make it sound like your telling him what to do cause you know he'll just do the opposite.
    hello.


    this answer may not be the one u were looking for, but as a teen this wat i can tell u


    i dont think its a good idea to let him learn through his mistakes coz then it might be too late and his days as a teen may only leave him guilty of his actions for the rest of his life.moreover there may be a day when he might blame u for being bad parents. he will also set a bad example to his siblings.


    i guess it wud be better if his dad talks to him abt growing up into a man and the desires that may crop up during the transition phase. this is a very sensitive issue...he might think u r interfering in his life and yes..sneak around or become arrogant and not listen to u at all. so the talk should not offend him or embarrass him. be as caring and polite as possible but still be the 'parent' and may be just suggest him to try out new frnds or have a hobby to engage him. tell him u r as worried abt him as he wud be if his younger siblings wud take a wrong path(well if he really cares)





    all ican say is that once u start the talk u will know wat to do next and how to deal wit it....try to normal , not over caring or some sudden change in ur attitude towards him...let it be a gradual one....
    move away and take him with you. sounds like you and he may have lost some closeness you need to find a way to get close to him again.