19 and my mother is FORCING abortion on me harshly. Mums with teens, advice dearly appreciated especially!?

I'm 19 and pregnant. My mum is completely against everything regarding me being pregnant with my 21 year old boyfriend. I told her numerous times that I'd really appreciate a little more support but she still snaps.





She's been saying very hurtful things since she found out a few days ago such as:





';You won't have that baby over my dead body';





';I was up all night last night making a plan for you to abort'





';There's no way you're having it';





(I told her I was on my way to the library yesterday when she said'; ';Don't you dare get any baby/pregnancy crap books. Not grandparenting ones either or I'll kick your ***';





It's just, she can really hurt me and I feel so alone.. I need her more and my boyfriend (who is wanting to study in San Deigo for 2 years more than the baby when he could stay here and study the same thing) than anyone else on this right now.. So I just feel like I'm going to lose this battle in a matter of weeks.





And yes, I did infact borrow a few pregnancy guides in which i had to hide under my carseats etc and have been reading and reading getting excited for myself (Eventhough my bf tells me I shouldn't as I'm getting myself to warm and fuzzy).


I am happy for myself (And am only one congratulating myself on this pregnancy) I would give full committment and love to this child.





Is there suggestions on what I can do/say to her?


I don't want to lose my mum's relationship with me nor do I want to lose the baby. I feel so confused and stuck in the middle.19 and my mother is FORCING abortion on me harshly. Mums with teens, advice dearly appreciated especially!?
OMG dont let them do that to you. im 19 too and i got prego when i was 17 and i had him when i was 18. dont give up your baby for their well being. THat is your baby, omg think about this after you have him or her that baby looking up at you. your the mommy protect em. i was young when i had my son, and i suggested it. but my son saved me. everything happens for a reason. also if your worried about money there are gov plans that can help you and dont be afriad to ask either, i needed help and couldnt have done it alone. They help pay for school. if your mother and your boyfriend wont support you, there is always a way. and remeber this is your lil baby, inside your belly, and in acouple of months you will feel her or him kick inside you. its the best feeling in the world. knowing that your baby is inside your bellly and it already loves you with out even seeing your face. My love for my son is unconditional and your love for you baby will be the same. you know in your heart what to do and you feel it already. Do what your heart says because after you make that desions their is no going back and you will have lost the best and most valueable thing in your life. also i wanna let you know that im not this anti abortion person sometimes i belive abortion is excepted, but in your case. Dont let them hurt your baby. because you can do it with out them. Put YOUR FOOT DOWN and tell your mom to shut the f*%26amp;#$ up and tell her your having the baby weather she likes it or not. stand up for you baby because you are the only one that loves and knows it at this point. good look to you new mommy i feel for you. and your situation is so close to mine i just hope you make the right choice, and ignore the pressure you have to abort your baby. also keep in mind what your mother is wanting you to do exactly she is wanting you to murder your baby and her granchild, just wait when you feel that baby kick omg its the best. good luck i will pray for you ok gal19 and my mother is FORCING abortion on me harshly. Mums with teens, advice dearly appreciated especially!?
Tell your mom that you love her with all your heart but, that you want to have the baby and love him/her the same way you love her.Also let her know that you are going to be 100% responsible with the baby.Don't drink any tea that comes from your mom though (just to be safe)LOL





Good luck
well since no one is congratulating you on your pregnancy...CONGRATULATIONS!!! I hope you decide to do what YOU want. what YOU think is right. Your mother has no right to force an abortion, it is in fact YOUR body and YOUR baby. And don't forget that.
its your choice she has no Control over what you do


do what you feels best but a Life is a terrible thing to waste.
Give your grandmother an extremely late-term abortion
two things to say...


1. it's YOUR baby, sweetie do whatever it is that you and that baby's father want to do





with that said..





2. don't expect your mother to raise YOUR child.. that could be what she's afraid of...





sorry for the lack of support u have.. i could see it sucking a lot for your own parents to hate what your doing... look for support from the baby's father and if he ain't dishing out the support either then that's exactly how everyone will be after the baby is born..





*and having one abortion isn't going to stop your chances later.. not so sure about the other one thou :o/





but do realize... she (your mother) is going to love you regardless %26amp; when the baby is born she just may change her mind when she see's the little one and all their chubby little rolls :o) ...good luck sweetie!
I totally agree with jessica, i was 18 when i fell pregnant and i was only with my (now fiancee) for two months and my family was happy for me but his family told me to get an abortion and when i refused they stopped talking to me and were always bitching about me on the phone to my boyfriend during my pregnancy but after i had my daughter (now 23 months old) they came down to visit and fell in love with her and now im the favourite inlaw and have put my anger towards them aside and when we told them i was pregnant with this bubba they congratulated us, im nearly 21 and will have a 2nd child next month. see what im saying is its you choice on everything and you can totally choose to ignore her and abortion is definently not the answer, whats your mums problem? is she scared your gonna leave her or shes gonna lose your attention if you have this baby....stand up to her and if she is still adament about you having an abortion organise somewhere else to stay.... GOOGD LUCK!!
abortion is not an option for you as you want the baby. Your mother cannot make you get one. You are 19 years old, and more than capable of raising a child. All of this i'm sure you know already.





I'm afraid what you have to do is just block out all the cruel opinions and things that are said to you. Stay away from your mother as much as possible. Chances are, once the baby is born, she will warm to it as she won't be able to help herself. Everything then will be fine.





You are going to have to find a way to cope with the stress of it, as i'm sure you know, prolonged stress is not good for your baby.





Just hang in there, you are a fully grown woman and you can deal with this.





I was also diagnosed with polycystic ovaries and told it may effect my fertility. A year later I got pregnant with my little girl, and when she was 1, i got pregnant again. If you are cycling even semi-regularly, even if your cycles are long, you shouldn't have a problem. It causes a problem in women who tend to go months without ovulating and so cant properly pinpoint when they should try to conceive.





Anyway, congratulations on your pregnancy. Try to enjoy every minute of it as much as you can. You have been given such a wonderful gift.
She can not force you to do anything against your will as you are 19... !!





I had my first child at 19 so i know scary time and so many things to think about!!





But if you are excited that is really all hat matters.. i would say tho if you are still living at your mum's you need to move out! I know this is going to be a hard thing.. especially with finance ect... but you need to do that!





Just explain to her it is YOUR choice and nothing she says or does is going to change that... if she cannot support your decision then yeah ... oh well for her she misses out.





Good luck sorry no real advice :)
Ultimately it is your body, and your baby. Abortions can be very terrible for the mother, and you're killing a human being who is a part of you and your boyfriend. If your mom is saying things like she's going to kick your a** you should think about staying somewhere else. Communicate to her that you love her, and you don't want to hurt her, but you love this baby, you're keeping it, and that is that. She probably just thinks that you're ruining your life, but that doesn't mean that it's ok for her to be speaking to you or treating you this way.
Whereas ';rejected'; does have valid points for abortion, polycystic ovary syndrome can result in infertility, so if you put off pregnancy until later in life, you may not be able to conceive. Your mother has no legal right to prevent your having the child, but if you are living with and completely dependent on her, she will make your life a living hell.





She could always simply kick you out of the house, then you would be a homeless unwed mother. Maybe she does have ultimate control after all, especially since you've implied in a previous question that you fear your bf may be trying to ditch you by running to San Diego.





OK - my opinion. Your life situation is too unstable at this time for a pregnancy. Get your life straight first before starting another one.
Kay you need to kindly explain to her that it's YOUR body not hers, and that you are deciding to keep the baby. She will come to terms with it soon enough. You just need to give her time to accept it. And don't try to hide your feelings because of what people tell you to do. Forget them. There is a LIFE inside of you. And when that rolly polly child comes out, and looks up at you with their big ol' eyes, your heart is going to melt and everyone is going to realize that this baby is a miracle, and they will ALSO realize they were wrong for wnting to KILL IT. Abortion is NOT an option. You are more then old enough to make the decision to keep your baby.
maybe you should tell her that you're going to keep the baby no matter what she says or how she feels about it and if she doesn't like it than she doesnt need to be apart of yours or the babys life..


she will realize that she was wrong but then she might not.. its risky either way.


%26amp; no matter if ur have Polycystic ovaries or not there's always the risk that abortion can affect future fertility.
You're an adult, she can't tell you what to do.





Even if she wasn't, she can't force you to get an abortion.





There are shelters for pregnant women which are free, you could offer a friend half their rent, look into rooming, or move in with the father of the baby. Another relative may take you in as well.





Move out, give your mother some time, talk to her about when you were a baby, she'll eventually get used to the idea, if not, you need to do what's best for the baby, but give her some alone time first.
My prayers are with you. As a mother who's dealt with a step-son's pregnancy with his girlfriend (later wife), it's hard. She shouldn't say things out loud right now, but she probably sees her dreams for your future in different ways than she'd like to. Once she sees her grandchild, her attitude will be different. Know your rights, and there's no way she can force you to have an abortion. If she keeps insisting, just tell her instead of her spending money on an abortion, that she needs to just give you the money, and you'll go away from her (she will come around I bet, give her a little time).





Having polycystic ovarian syndrome does make it harder for many women to get pregnant. Having an abortion may or may not affect it, but giving birth to this child has a good chance of helping the problem for later on fertility. Ironically, to ensure future fertility, the best thing you can do after you have the baby is to get on birth control, which will help prevent the cysts on the ovaries. An abortion carries risks which can cause fertility problems even when done in a hospital setting.





Tell your mother that this might be the only chance you have to be able to have a child, because of the polocystic ovarian syndrome. I wish you luck, and peace with your family.
It's your body and your decision.





Your decision. If your mother truly loves and respects you, then she will support you, regardless of the decision that you make. Tell her that you WILL have this child, either with or without her support. She has no right to make decisions about your body or your right to carry a child to term. And if she doesn't like it, well your mother doesn't have to be a part of your life. You can leave home. There are agencies out there who are designed to support young woman like you.





Talk to your doctor. Explain that your mother has been trying to emotionally blackmail you in to having an abortion. Your doctor may be able to give you information about local support groups.





As I said. Your body, your choice. No one can force you to have an abortion. Stand up for yourself. Tell your mother that she either respects your decision, or butts out of your life completely.
It's impossible for her to FORCE anything on you if you're 19.


But she's probably right about the abotion thing.


But it's your choice.





-- The Secret Doctor Team
If you want to screw up your life for the next 18 years go ahead. Don't expect the boyfriend to stay around, he'll be off studying and improving his life while you change diapers and work three part time jobs to support yourself.


Your mother is right. She's being harsh for your own good. Don't you want something else out of life? Don't you want to get a good job, travel, meet people, enjoy holidays and time to yourself?


Abort now, you can always go again when the time is right.





Don't throw your life away for a baby that will take over your life and destroy your future.
Hi 19,





It's a really difficult decision to make. I understand where you are coming from...noone can force you to do anything you don't want to do with your body. On the other hand, I TOTALLY agree with your mother. You are 19, and there is a lot of challenges with having a child at your age. Are you working, self-supporting, living on your own, plan to go to college...etc! If you can't take of yourself, then you may need to think this over...